MAN, YOU LOOK LIKE A LOSAH!

 In highschool I skipped a lot. Part of the reason was because it was wicked easy to skip. My highschool was 45 minutes away. Before I had a license my mother let me drive to and from school. When I got to the exit for my school I often kept going and changed the direction, drove all the way into Boston and bought records then I would go home. In homeroom the disciplinarian would come over the loudspeaker and read off the list of names of kids who had not showed up. I'm not kidding one of the kids was named Mike Hunt. He was totally given that name as a joke by another kid. Pretty god damned funny. The thing is the day you showed up after being out sick you just had to produce a note. I forged my mother's name a ton.

 I fucking hated gym class. I had two gym teachers, they were Mr. White and Mr. Loftus and they were awful. I literally saw Mr. White punch a kid in the locker room. Also whenever we played basketball he called me "special olympics," that was my nick name. I used to intentionally foul out within the first couple minutes, then I just stopped showing up at school on days that I had gym.

I also had a thing with my mother. My father had left for work and she was up having her morning coffee and cigarette. If I didn't feel like even driving to school I would say to her, "Hey Ma, you wanna go to Kmart?" And then we would go there and not go to school. She never told my father we were doing this. We did it a lot. One time when I was a junior the disciplinarian called me into his office and said if you skip one more day you'll be expelled. So I didn't skip anymore, but I literally had skipped like a 100 days starting sophmore year. One time I was in Boston after skipping school. I was on Newbury Street going to Newbury Records. I had my school clothes on, this was a maroon and black sweater and tan chinos. I felt fucking cool because I had skipped school and was walking around Boston in my new school sweater. A homeless guy was walking towards me, when he was a couple feet from me, he pointed at me and said, "Man, you look like a losah." I remember thinking, "Well, at least I have a place to go to after this." 

The other thing I should tell you about this highschool, after homeroom they would occasionally have us go to the gym for an assembly. One time the Dean of Students, Brother Fahey was talking. People started applauding everything he said. We kept applauding for so long it was going into the next class. They could not shut us up. Every time they said anything we applauded. The whole school, 1200 kids were there, they could not control us. Finally a guy came out with a dustpan and brush and started banging them together. Apparently this is the universal sign for "Quiet Down".