HOSTESS PRODUCTS

 I grew up on Hostess products I love them. Little white donuts and cupcakes were literally a part of my diet. When I was a kid I was wicked into Big Wheels which had totally insensitive Native American cartoons on the bag. They eventually changed these and they became King Doh's. One time me and my brother moved in together and we worked the same hours, probably at the same restaurant. When we got home we would smoke pot and eat our shit. This was our nightly intake: 2 liters of Coke, a big bag of Cool Ranch Doritos and a box of Ding Dongs. After a couple days of this diet I said, "We're gonna fucking die." But I loved Ding Dongs. 

I was in line at Safeway getting my lunch. If you are familiar with San Francisco I was at the Safeway near Potrero. Like 16th street, around there. There was a Hostess factory behind the Safeway. It smelt awful but it had cool trucks of course. I was in line at the Safeway with my lunch which was a big bag of little white donuts. There was a woman in front of me, I said to her, "You have half a gallon of milk, 6 eggs and 1 bagel." She goes, "You are totally right, how did you know what I was getting?" and I said, "Because you're ugly." That's a joke. That is not what happened at all. What really happened was there were 2 guys behind me in overalls. They saw I was buying donuts and said "We work at the hostess factory." I practically saluted them. I said, "Thank you I love your products." and one of them said, "You wouldn't like them if you saw how we make them." That did not stop me at all. I still love cupcakes.